I have a little secret for you.
Are you ready to hear it?
Come a little closer so I can whisper it into your ear.
I sssstill have all my wisssssdom teeeeeth.
Luckily for me, I was born during the era of modern medicine, so when my last wisdom tooth starts cutting through and I get a little bacterial infection, I don’t have to wait until it spreads into my brain and I die. I ask my sister to watch the baby and go pamper myself at the dentist for a couple of hours, where everyone asks me how I’m feeling and seems very concerned about my well-being. I might even stop by the grocery store on the way home if I’m feeling especially indulgent. What a time to be alive.
It got me to thinking, I am so lucky to be a millennial mother, and not just because my physical deficiencies and deformities require teams of contemporary doctors to keep me alive. I know what you’re thinking -- what about all the pressure of being a modern parent? Don’t you feel so much pressure? Nope. I think I would feel more pressure if I was expected to use an actual pressure cooker and can all my own food, iron the bed sheets, cook multiple courses, or sew all my baby’s clothes just to have her ruin them with her neon alien poop. Being a mom seems like it used to be so much harder.
Do you remember when you were growing up how people would just stop by? Or how when you got the mail or a package you would have to answer the door? You literally had to have clothes on all the time. When people come over to my home, it is carefully planned in advance via text message (phone anxiety!) and I spend hours choosing which of my three outfits I’m going to wear. I scrub the toilets and wipe the mirrors, maybe light a candle, but I usually don’t mop because mopping is a waste of time.
A lot of moms get overwhelmed by the internet and social media, but let’s all just take a deep breath and try to be a little more appreciative, a little more centered, like I am. Let’s just let go of the imaginary pressure we put on ourselves to post every little thing with perfect lighting.
Okay now that we have taken care of you and your feelings, let’s get back to me. I am getting my wisdom teeth extracted next week, and I’m not sure how to go about it. In your experience, on a scale of 1-10, how willing is your dental office to change the light bulbs in your procedure room to something more flattering, 1 being “ignoring your voice mails” and 10 being “also volunteering to take photos from angles that hide your jowls while you’re unconscious”? Mine is at a 2 and I’m considering finding another doctor who better understands a modern mother’s needs.
Libbie Henrie is a new mother and really smart gal. You should believe everything she writes, especially the super sarcastic parts. She lives in Arizona with her husband and newborn baby. You can read more of her musings on her blog and follow her baby wearing adventures on Instagram @sweetcheeksbabywearing